"Integrity Is Everything" Part 1

Not only a great title for a book, but a great title for your life. I just finished this book by John Lavenia (www.johnlavenia.com). John is a fellow leader in my business, and has had fantastic success in all areas of his life. I have personally met John and his wife Shannon, and they truly are role models-people who live with integrity everyday. His book gets down to the nitty gritty of how to be successful in life, love, business, and everything in between. I'll discuss this book in a 2 part series. It would really take infinite parts to do it justice, but you really should just read the book yourself.

What I like about this book especially is the sugar free approach. This really jives with my beliefs, and it will for anyone else who likes to hear it straight. You have to really be shocked into change sometimes, since most people are comfortable living the status quo. First things first, John stresses the importance of being your own guru. When looking to make a change in their lives, most people look for answers outside of themselves. Of course, it is useful to mastermind with people getting the results you want, but ultimately the solutions to your problems lie within YOU. No amount of reading or studying will get you what you want until you accept this, and embrace it! 

So, what are you trying to achieve? If you want things to change, you better get clear on your goals. Are you on a mission? To get what you want, you have to start questioning your beliefs-and this takes guts. After all, your beliefs probably were instilled in you as a child by those around you. You have to take the fork in the road, be willing to "depart from ways of the masses," as John writes. You need to be a leader. The term "leader" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, but I feel it is misunderstood. The implication is that a leader is someone who was born that way, or has some sort of qualities that most people cannot have. That is rubbish, quite frankly. Everyone can be a leader, and I would argue that everyone must be a leader in order to get what they want out of life. Non leaders are the people who blame circumstances, play the victim, and hold onto their comfort zone for dear life. I agree with John's definition of a leader, which is someone who has vision. This person is on a mission. They have a purpose, and they are committed to that purpose. When you are undeniably committed to your purpose, people will follow you. Why? Because you are in a sea of people with no direction, and you are holding a road map. A vision.

Once you have your vision, you are on your way to success! However, the work doesn't stop there. It is time to acknowledge the fact that you got results you didn't want up until this point because of your decisions. Accept responsibility, then move on. You can no longer make decisions based on the past. That is not what a leader does. The truth is, the majority of people will choose the results they have been getting over the possibility of something new, even if  they didn't like the results the first time around! There isn't any actual thinking involved in the decision making process, only conditioned response. To protect the predictability of their lives, people would rather get the same consistently terrible results, than to make a change. John compares this to a dog reacting to stimulus. Do you want to be a dog or a leader?

John puts it quite clearly, "You can either be "right" in your previously existing ways and continue getting the results you're getting, or you could be willing to confront reality and stop assuming that you know so much, because you don't." He prefaces that statement with "If this bursts your bubble, so be it." Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. 

So stop making decisions based on your mother's friend's cousin's little tidbit of life advice! If it is not serving you NOW, it will not serve you in the future. Got it? You know, they call John the Godzilla of personal development, and I may just apply for the title of Godesszilla. Sorry, Shannon!